They've gone mad

[fabian]

Hi Guys!

New here but I thought I must post as I am having some real problems! I am not of any religion (tend to side with science!) but recently my parents have become fundamentalist christians. Luckily I do not live with them as I am married!!!

It has been a really traumatic experience for me and my brother's and sister's as my parents have suddenly changed beyond recognition. They used to be a lot of fun, very liberal and tolerant people.

Now they exclude people who do not beleive what they do, never stop ramming their religion down people's throat, trying to convert people..... it's a nightmare. My mum especially has turned into a TOTAL bigot - hating gays and basically anyone who doesn't love god. They are even preaching to my sister (who co-habits with her boyfriend) about sex before marriage. They seem to have forgotten that they were pregnant with me BEFORE they were married! Must have been the immaculate conception!!

I just cannot for the life of me understand how so suddenly they have undergone a complete personality transplant and sense of humour bypass?! I feel like i have lost my parents. I am finding it increasingly difficult to even talk to them as they just constantly bang on about God. I mentioned in passing that I was going shopping for shoes (which is a religion to me LOL!!) and they looked at me all holier than thou and said that if I found Jesus, material things become secondary. I mention this to demonstrate how something totally mundane and passing comments they now see as an opportunity to ram their religion down my throat!

I have sort of stopped calling them now as they do my head in. The worst thing about this is that if I ever in the past forgot to keep in touch for a bit, my mum would be on the phone! Now it seems that they have a new family in their church and we are secondary. It scares me that 2 ordinary people can succumb to this type of thing so late in life?

I keep getting guilt trips from my parents about not going to church (never have and now definitely never will) and i just want to know the best way to deal with this? The last conversation with my mum ended rather badly with me yelling "I've got 2 words for you - number 1; TOLERANCE, number 2; DINOSAURS!"

not good I know but they are driving me mad.

Any advice would be very much appreciated.

Fabian

[Jolly Sapper]

bummer...

Have you tried talking to them about what made them suddenly turn so violently Christian?

I could understand getting older and turning to religion to help gain some comfort with their own mortality but to suddenly go bat shit Christian on you seems odd.

[afreethinker30]

Yes odd that it would happen like that.Maybe because of their age they are afraid of their belief in god,and feel if they don't totally change their lives that they will go to hell.With my mom we got along great until I got around 16 then we started having problems.It wasn't until I moved out without telling her and 4 months of not speaking til things got better.Maybe some time apart is best??

[myleviathan]

It's very interesting that your parents both decided to embrace theism at the same time. Most people turn to belief in times of emotional hardship. So it may be a sign of a deeper problem that they may not be sharing, or maybe you know something they were going through. I would just be sure to let them know that you're there for them. Let them know you are a shoulder to lean on in times of hardship. People who have strong family support are less likely to turn to a god all of the sudden. Who knows, maybe the'll eventually snap out of it after seeing first-hand how manipulative and rediculous the church is.

[MommaSquid]

Fabian, I'm sorry to hear about your troubles with your parents.  

You didn't mention how old they are, but it may be time for them to have physical and mental evaluations from their primary doctors.  Illness (both mental and physical) can cause personality changes.

Or maybe their worldview has simply devolved into a state of intolerance.  At least they're not annoying each other with their "holier than thou" antics!

[fabian]

Thanks Guys for your responses!

In answer to your questions, they are intheir mid 60's (not OLD old) and were perfectly normal before they got this visit to the door. I think a mental evaluation may be in order, but why both of them at the same time?? how can this be?

I am not bothered by religion per se, each to their own, but they are so MILITANT and have changed so uickly. They are giving all of their money away to this "church" and i think they have been completely taken in by this preacher.

Its really sad to see two wonderful people go down this route. I have tried talking to them on many occasions but it is just like talking to a brick wall. NIGHTMARE!!!

[fabian]

bummer...

Have you tried talking to them about what made them suddenly turn so violently Christian?

I could understand getting older and turning to religion to help gain some comfort with their own mortality but to suddenly go bat shit Christian on you seems odd.

Hi

I have talked to them and they just say that they had a "calling" whatever that may be and it always seems to be my mum doing the talking and my dad just kind of going  along with things pottering around in the background. whichever way you look at it - its odd. this is why i am struggling with it!!

Its just so WIERD. They say nothing of mortality etc, just that this is the "way" for them. Don't get me wrong, we were a very communicating family so this is even worse.

I smply hate the fact that they can take an essentially peaceful and tolerant religion, put a bad preacher in the frame and you have a money sapping platform for breeding hate and intolerance. It really doesn't work for me, and from my brothers and sisters opinions it has wrecked our family as we knew it.

[afreethinker30]

Thanks Guys for your responses!

In answer to your questions, they are intheir mid 60's (not OLD old) and were perfectly normal before they got this visit to the door. I think a mental evaluation may be in order, but why both of them at the same time?? how can this be?

I am not bothered by religion per se, each to their own, but they are so MILITANT and have changed so uickly. They are giving all of their money away to this "church" and i think they have been completely taken in by this preacher.

Its really sad to see two wonderful people go down this route. I have tried talking to them on many occasions but it is just like talking to a brick wall. NIGHTMARE!!!

You saying that makes me think alot of cults and how the followers give away their money and isolate themselves.

[dodgecity]

Wow, fabian, that sucks. I feel for you.

Maybe as their life draws to an end, they are longing for something more. That combined with their creeping senility has led them to religion.

I can see how much it hurts that they have found a new family that "transcends" your earthly one. That is truly horrible and unfair. Jesus said to abandon our earthly families and follow him. That's one example of how faith is inherently evil, and you see that now more than ever.

I you decide to talk to them further about the subject(which I'm not sure will do any good), be sure to get across a singular message to them: the hurt they have caused to you and others. They need to feel shame for their nonsensical beliefs.

And as you have already noted, it is intensely hypocritical that they both converted at the same time.